Tag: poem

Cross-roads

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My mug is almost dry of mocha deliciousness and my body is aching to go back up into the sunlight this gloriously bright Saturday! And yet I sit here and write, the reasons for which are murky in the recesses of my mind. But maybe it’s just been too long since I’ve properly written, or maybe it’s just because I have too many thoughts swirling around and they’re in need of release. Or maybe it’s just because I’m in a talkative mood? (Or whatever word would be more appropriate for the written word!) Perhaps my muse is just a bit over-caffeinated? Surely not. Anyways, almost half twelve here and that is quite late enough to spend here in the depths of Starbucks.

But briefly now(who am I kidding?), saw Dark Knight Rises last night with Alec and Chris and Jo…most intense. Epic. Heart-pounding(seriously, the music had my adrenaline pumping pretty much the whole movie). Did I love it? Hard to say, as it is a rather dark movie(like the previous two). But this movie ended in the light. And for that, I do think I can safely say I enjoyed it much. It contained echoes of terror, glimpses of hope. I think I can safely say it’s my favorite movie the year, thus far. Which isn’t saying much, since I think I’ve only seen three to four this year. But still.

And now that the previous paragraph(as disjointed as it was) is over, time to return to my fleet-footed thoughts. This past week at work has been both stressful and God-glorifying. Truly, if God is for me(as He most truly is!), what can mere man do to me?? This is the height of rhetorical questions. And while my future still seems but a haze to me, it is not the dim fog of fear, but merely the misty wind of the unknown. I cannot – shall not – ever doubt that my future is anything but good. Because I serve a good God. Because I serve a living God.

And truly, my thoughts wander far afield yet again. But it is good to write. My fingers have been idle too long.

A road that winds over the banks
of fog and fear and fires below,
seems to end in mists and sand and
trails off into deepest shadow.

But never doubt! Why do I cry
when I do not wander alone
or whisper unheard or even
sink deep into my bed unknown.

A road that lies over the mounts
of lies and hope and cruelest pain
shall surely not end in terror
but proceed upward, home again.

It is good to rest this gorgeous day. It is good for me to be here.

And now, up into the sunlight do I go. Have a most beautiful day, my most treasured friends!

Unbroken

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A tilt of earth,
A veil of lace,
A song of mirth,
A dance of grace!

Upon the wild mountains,
Throughout the misty streams,
A midst the towers stalwart,
Living forgotten dreams.

Whither goes the songstress?
Whither goes the sage?
Who now wields true justice?
Who to end this age?

A flight of laughter,
A bout of tears,
A leap of logic,
Pray bless our years!

Living in the lowlands,
A midst the droughts we kneel,
Throughout the pits most fey,
Upon a dream most real.

Who to dance upon the altar?
Who to tend the fires above?
Who to linger in the glories?
Who to dance the songs of love?

Once more the anthem rings,
Once more shall herald sound,
Once more the light triumphant,
Truly, the lost is found!

King of Kings and Lord of Lords!
Almighty Father above!
Jesus, Saviour, Redeemer!
To Him all praise and all love!

Upon the mount unveiled,
Throughout love strewn stories,
A midst the mist of dreams,
Living now, true glories!

A rift of time,
A song of seas,
A lilting rhyme,
A kiss of peace!

Softly dreaming

James HoganLeave a comment

So should I be in bed right now? Well, yes. Actually, I am sort of in bed already now, since my bed is the couch and I am sitting on it! But while my eyelids are drooping and my thoughts are fading…I still feel I must write a few words. And so I will be uncharacteristically brief, but wanted to write one last post from Florida before I fly back to Scotland tomorrow.

This trip has been most glorious – although it’s flown past far too quickly for my liking! Nevertheless, I have been oh so blessed these past days…from my times of joy with my family and friends to a pretty sweet weekend past in Gainesville(where I spent time with some of the best friends known to mankind…maybe later I’ll write more on this, but just know that hanging out with Rob, Laurie, Dan and Betsy is pretty much the best thing ever. Just saying. Talking and talking and praying and being together…epic. I can’t really think of a better word right now. Maybe I’m just tired. Or maybe there just isn’t one. Nonetheless, I should probably close this parentheses) But yeah, Gainesville was awesome(also may have included some sweet disc golfing with Dan, Rob, Laura and George…as well as quality time back at the Lebos – one of my favorite families ever!!)

And then driving back home with Laura this afternoon, with the beautifully thunderous rain pounding down on the windshield and the windswept trees of central Florida shadowing our path…I just couldn’t help but thank our God for his goodness to me. Always.

And then being with my family tonight – eating dinner and talking and being encouraged by the best parents in the universe and then watching some classic 24(3 episodes was not enough!)…capped by reading a few Psalms together. Love it.

And since this post has been characteristically not brief…I’ll close.

Time for some sleep. And then one more day here in Florida. Here at home.

Love longs to leave one last encore-
Songs spill across the sun spun night,
Crystal chandelier, caressing sight.
And stars named
and blessed
with light.

Springtime

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As I soak in the sunlight
and gaze at the
cloud-speckled blue above,
As I look out over the city
and ponder the
great sea stretched
to sky beyond,
As my green pen traverses
the paper and uncorks
my thoughts to
the wind,
As my hair tosses slowly
and revels in spring’s
gentle kiss,
As my heart is still
in the quiet of
this moment,
I feel bliss,
I feel joy,
I am loved.

Very rough yet very real. Enjoy for what it is.

Oh what a gorgeous day this is!

Now time to walk again in the light of this fading day.

Swallowed in the sea

James HoganLeave a comment

Well, I *was* going to go to bed freakishly early tonight(say, around 9pm!!), but as happens many a night, I got distracted by a good book. Oops. I really should keep the books further from my bed.

Anyways, reading in “The Glory of Christ” by John Owen…and I got to say, as much of a struggle it sometimes is to wade through his gorgeously intricate paragraphs, it’s so worth it. Any of you that own this(hey, I can’t be the only one!) needs to read the last few pages of Chapter 10…amazingly beautiful. I don’t quote from books often here, but…

The due remembrance of what the blessed Lord Jesus hath done for us, of the ineffable love which was the spring, cause and fountain of what he so did – thoughts of the mercy, grace, peace and glory which he hath procured thereby – are the great and unconquerable motives to fix our faith, hope, trust and confidence in him.

His divine nature is the ground and warranty for our so doing. This is that from whence he is the due and proper object of all divine faith and worship. From the power and virtue thereof do we expect and receive all those things which in our believing on him we seek after; for none but God can bestow them on us, or work them in us. There is in all the actings of our faith on him, the voice of the confession of Thomas, “My Lord and my God.”

Oh lovely.

And I could go on quoting..but I shall refrain. For now!

Oh but… just thinking about another one of my favs…

In this is love, not that we loved God, but that
He loved us and sent His Son to be the
propitiation for our sins.

And from this amazing truth does our love spring!

Adrift in raging seas
and lost in the maelstrom of silence
and seized in the chains of the poets
and drowning in rainbows.

Drowning yet grasping and
gasping and hoping and
praying and trying and
living yet dying.

Until there came a light,
the light that was a man
the man that was a lord
Our Lord and our God!

So no longer do we writhe,
and no longer do we write,
but still, but still, we sigh
in love, for love, divine.

Have a most glorious night, y’all!!

Speaking foreign language..

James HoganLeave a comment

Starbucks time, yo!

Yep, it’s a Saturday morning here and I’m rocking out in Starbucks…catching up on some reading(just finished reading Joshua…awesome book. “…but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”), enjoying my peppermint mocha and doughnut(that I bought as I was walking down George St. – SO GOOD), catching up on some emails and now relaxing here in the soft light of the Starbucks basement(and yes, this is ok because it’s rainy outside, so not really that nice to be out today)…

I always find it interesting looking around at all the other people here in Starbucks(hmmm, hopefully this doesn’t make me too much of a creeper?)…out of the ten other people in the room here, three are on laptops like me and the rest are enjoying their friends. One guy over in the corner also has his white earbuds in as he’s pondering whatever’s on his computer…a blonde girl is sipping what looks like a latte as the light from her Mac shines on her face and she flexes her fingers..another girl in a rad black and gold headband is chewing away on something as she taps on her Toshiba…and then there’s me, a random bearded fellow in his brown San-Fran shirt, tapping furiously on his Vaio as he attempts to chronicle his morning… The rest of the people in the room are happily(or so I imagine) talking to each other, but I can’t really hear them as I’m currently also listening to music(Nightwish – “End of All Hope”) for writing muse purposes.

Alright, enough randomness for you yet?? I’m honestly not sure why I started this entry…not a lot has gone on since I last wrote here(what – yesterday?), but I figure I’m in Starbucks and in a writing mood….so now is as good a time as any.

And I’m now writing this almost an hour later from the previous paragraph…just got done writing some emails and messages to people whom I haven’t seen in far too long…it’s almost depressing how long it’s been since I’ve seen some friends. To think that almost two years has gone by since I’ve seen some dear friends…yeah. Trying not to think about that! Moving off that topic…apparently I’ve scared most of the people here at Starbucks away, as there’s only four people left besides me! A few people talking at a table…but two of the laptop people are still here, too! White Earbud Guy moved tables(I don’t really know why?) to where Blonde Mac Girl was sitting(she’s long gone)…and Rad Headband Girl is still in her corner across from me, intently staring into her screen.

And I think this update must be the longest one I’ve ever written with so little actual content. My apologies!! (Well sort of. Writing about random people at Starbucks is surprisingly fun.)

On a cloud-laced sun blessed morning,
taking the path less trod than most,
relishing once more wind’s caress,
slaying once more grim nighttime’s ghost.

Breathing in the rose’s music,
Humming soft with the lyre of sighs,
Taking again the hand of light,
dreaming again of mist blessed skies.

Laughing with whirlwinds,
Dancing with seas,
Embracing
in arms
of twining
destinies
and falling ever faster
through the mirrors
of our wondrous songs
and feeling ever fuller
of hope more divine
and flying ever farther
into life and love.

And…

Love of stars and love of hosts,
Peace to men and truth be told!
Kindness felt and fire beheld,
Riches fall and powers ghost,
Swirling praises, gleaming throne,
All behold the glorious Lord!
For now and forever
and with the stars of eternity
and to the God of infinity
and to His eternal majesty
be all glory and praise
and honor and might
and power and anthem
and beauty and riches
and love all sublime
forever and now
for love all perfected
for love all divine
to our Lord
to our God
Amen and Amen.
Hallelujah.
Forever.
All glory to our God.

Swamplands

James HoganLeave a comment

So don’t have a lot of time for a yummy long update now…so you will just have to settle for me showing my face! And yes, I am now back in Scotland after a brief(but supremely wonderful!) couple weeks in Tampa. Got to see so many people that I’ve missed so much my joy cannot be fully expressed. And now as I roll away from Starbucks and walk home on this sleepy rainy day in Aberdeen…

Nameless fear and graceless fall,
hear and bow down, sinners all:

In the Presence, at your altar,
all my weakness praises You.

My spirit sings at Your name
and my eyes shine in Your glory
and my heart is full of wonder
at the sight of Your face.
My spirit weeps in love.
My purpose found.
I am with Thee.
Forever and always.

Örökké és mindig

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Late getting home from work and dinner calls my name(leftover Pizza Hut, yes!)…but briefly, have to express my sadness that Steven and Anna are both now gone from Aberdeen. Steven left last Friday(but I’ll see him in August in Germany!!) and Anna this evening…and I don’t know when I’ll see her again. Next year Hungary holiday? Um, yes!

But regardless of my silly feelings of loss and sadness…I must just rejoice in our great God in giving me such friends as these. Oh how blessed am I! Hung out with Anna and her sisters last night at my place, and though I(yet again!) got no sleep, it was oh so worth it! From playing random Magyar songs to playing card games(where the power of sisters forced me to admit defeat in every game I played. Hmph) to taking far too many pictures to laughing even more than talking…to driving one last time downtown with Anna…to simply glorying in one last time of awesomeness.

And now that I let my veil of denial down and admit that Steven and Anna are actually gone, I can embrace my sadness with tears of love. My love is with you, Anna, Steven. Always.

And…random poetry snippet just because I feel like it.

To see the stars,
I reach a little higher,
I drown in song.

Tears from love,
tears from joy,
all for unrequited glory
all for long forgotten story
all for the love of a Potter
all for the love of a King.

To see the stars,
I kneel a little lower,
I drown in love.

Shattered Gates of Bronze

James HoganLeave a comment

Burning star and singing pain,
Caught in tempests, lost in rain.
Lifting up a weary hand,
Finding not the long sought land.

Swords of furies, eyes of rage,
Bloody steel and war torn age.
Lifting up a dying friend,
Finding now the final end.

Tear soaked face and keening cry
Bound in iron, lost the sky.
Lifting up a hopeless gaze,
Finding not the sun’s warm rays.

Pits of corpses, graves of doom,
Rotting souls and song-less tomb
Lifting up a wordless plea,
Finding now he cannot see.

And seeing not,
he feels a hand,
warmth of sunshine
embrace of wind,
kiss of starlight,
songs of glory,
weight of crowns.
‘Open your eyes,’
And he is home.

Green olive tree

James HoganLeave a comment

The wanderer turns his head
and sighs
at the beauty of the skies.

A grasp of moonlight
beckons in
from blushing day
to richer night
ever purer
ever light.

A path of moonlight
beckons on
from softer black
to deeper blue
ever honeyed
ever true.

A laugh of moonlight
beckons up
from colder earth
to star strewn sight
ever blissful
ever right.

The wanderer turns his head
and cries
at the witness of the skies.