Born that way

Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity,
and in sin my mother conceived me.
Behold, You desire truth in the innermost being,
and in the hidden part You will make me know wisdom.
Purify me with hyssop, and I shall be clean;
wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
Make me to hear joy and gladness,
let the bones which You have broken rejoice.
Hide Your face from my sins
and blot out all my iniquities.
Create in me a clean heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
Do not cast me away from Your presence
and do not take Your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of Your salvation
and sustain me with a willing spirit.
Then I will teach transgressors their ways,
and sinners will be converted to You.
Deliver me from bloodguiltiness,
O God, the God of my salvation;
then my tongue will joyfully sing of
Your righteousness.
 -Psalm 51:5-14

Oh I will sing!!!

Ahh this has been such a sweet day!! Admittedly, I’ve been inside for most of it…but that’s because it’s been grey and gloomy and rainy outside all day long…so I decided it was a perfect day to relax indoors. Had a late night anyway(sweet party times with Aiysha and Sam et al!) so woke up sort of late…(11AM, eek! That’s probably my latest lie in in quite some time!) So after my shower I enjoyed my sweet bacon and coffee breakfast and reading…and for the past few hours I’ve been chilling in my living room and compiling a new iTunes playlist(felt it was time for a new one…and in doing so, realized I had NO “And Can it Be?”. That had to be rectified and so I found a sweet version…in this awesome CD that you all should get – Resolved Music, Vol 1 on Amazon. Great stuff)…so making the playlist took me a while because I kept getting distracted(first by talking to Laura on Gmail…and then Katheryn. So worth it though! *waves to both*). Anyways here’s the playlist I came up with…I’m pretty happy with it. Presenting…”The Homestretch”:

1. Such Great Heights – The Postal Service
2. It’s Beginning to Get to Me – Snow Patrol
3. All of Us – Blindside
4. Ever Dream – Nightwish
5. Dargor Shadowlord of the Black Mountain – Rhapsody of Fire
6. Nothing but the Blood – Jars of Clay
7. Go Hard ft. Tedashii – Lecrae
8. The Prodigal Son Suite – Keith Green
9. Something Beautiful – Needtobreathe
10. Die Alone – Ingrid Michaelson
11. Blackout – Muse
12. Yellow – Coldplay
13. Revelation 5 – Hope Bible Church
14. And Can it Be – The Enfield Hymn Sessions

Good stuff, neh? I’ve been listening to it right now and I am most pleased. I forwent my usual hardcore opening and went a little softer with Postal Service and Snow Patrol opening…but don’t worry, got at least a little power metal awesomeness in there with Nightwish and Rhapsody. I’ve been much enjoying Rhapsody of Fire on the way to work lately – glorious beautiful music(even if Galan’s the only other person I know that agrees!!)

And in other news, tonight having Steven, Maren and Anna over…my 3rd night having people over in four nights!! But this time, Maren and Anna are going to cook apparently, so I can relax a bit. Ooh, I probably should clean the kitchen a bit though before they’re here. Yes, good plan.

And although I think I have more to say, time to run to the store to get some juice for tonight and then prep my place for company. Hope y’all are having a most glorious day!!!

Rock on!

Light infused

Of good bacon and sweet coffee and loveliness…as I take this amazing Friday morning and glory in the beauty of the day!!! I’ve started a Friday tradition of waking up a bit earlier(around 5-ish instead of 5:30-ish) and making bacon along with coffee…and having a nice extended time to read and relax before I go off to work. And that means I *won’t* be spending much time writing…sorry, I know you all are terribly disappointed. Looking outside the window here as the sky slowly lightens…

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time
are not worthy to be compared with the glory
that is to be revealed to us.

-Romans 8:18

The Kingdom

Oh, the depth of the riches
both of the wisdom and knowledge
of God!
How unsearchable are His judgements
and unfathomable His ways!
For ‘Who has known the mind of the LORD,
or who became His counselor?’
Or ‘Who has first given to Him
that it might be paid back to Him again?’
From from Him and through Him and to Him are all things.
To Him be the glory forever.
Amen.

-Romans 11:33-36

So yeah, reading Romans 8.5 through 11…and I’ve decided they’re pretty much my favorite chapters right now. So so so amazing. And apparently Paul agreed with me as to the awesomeness of these chapters because the above passage is how he concludes! I want to write more to express my adoration for the Father…but my wonder at His love really can’t be much better stated than in the above verses. Anything I would add would just be rubbish…

Have a most glorious day, y’all!!

Merry Christmas!

In the beginning was the Word,
and the Word was with God, and
the Word was God. He was in the
beginning with God. All things came
into being through Him, and apart from
Him nothing came into being that has
come into being. In Him was life, and
the life was the Light of men. The
Light shines in the darkness, and the
darkness did not comprehend it.
…And the Word became flesh, and
dwelt among us, and we saw His
glory, glory as of the only begotten
from the Father, full of grace and truth.

-John 1:1-5,14

Oh wondrous words!!! I couldn’t think of any words more fitting for remembering the birth of Christ our Lord and Savior than these. Glory to God in the highest! And on earth, peace among men with whom He is pleased! Remember the birth of the King!!

Glory

My heart is steadfast, O God,
my heart is steadfast;
I will sing, yes, I will sing praises!
Awake, my glory!
Awake, harp and lyre!
I will awaken the dawn.
I will give thanks to You, O
Lord, among the peoples;
I will sing praises to You among
the nations.
For Your lovingkindness is great
to the heavens
And Your truth to the clouds.
Be exalted above the heavens, O God;
Let Your glory be above all the earth.

-Psalm 57:7-11

A glimmer, nay, a star

And you were dead in your trespasses
and sins, in which you
formerly walked according to the
course of this world, according to the
prince of the power of the air, of the
spirit that is now working in the sons
of disobedience. Among them we too
all formerly lived in the lusts of our
flesh, indulging the desires of the flesh
and of the mind, and were by nature
children of wrath, even as the rest.
But God, being rich in mercy, because
of His great love with which He
loved us, even when we were dead
in our transgressions, made us alive
together with Christ(by grace you have
been saved), and raised us up with
Him, and seated us with Him in the
heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so
that in the ages to come He might show
the surpassing riches of His grace in
kindness toward us in Christ Jesus.

-Ephesians 2:1-7

I was going to end that sooner, but two things prevented me. Firstly, it’s just so beautiful I couldn’t find a good stopping place…and secondly, because the sentence itself didn’t stop. Oh Pauline sentences, how I love thee.

Seriously, such a gorgeous passage, is it not? And two of the most amazing and heart-stopping and enlivening and lovely and starkly beautiful words of all time…”But God.” And hope bursts into glorious bloom, life eternal. This passage is one of my favorites, so I don’t know why I’m trying to unnecessarily validate these verses with my pitiful words, but I just can’t help marveling at the amazingness of God’s most gracious love and compassion towards such desperately wicked men and women…oh what a joy that springs from my heart, abounding towards the God whose love abounds still more! And I think this passage may (subconsciously) be the pattern towards which all my gasps of poetry tend to slip into –

darkness, expanding and vicious and cold blackness and
the depths of deepest despair and when all is lost and
man is
lost in a storm of whirling shadows and
torn in pieces by the knife that was his own and
rotting in the grave so eagerly dug and
drinking the depths of the debt that is owed and
wavering in glazed reality and
on his knees in hopeless emptiness and
on his face in stark weariness and
letting go of the last that could be done and then
light.
Light forever.
Glorious Almighty God.
Light and love and God Himself,
the pinnacle of infinity that the universe strains to grasp.
Oh glorious Lord!
And overwhelmed in joy and overcome by love
and soaking in the blood of the Lamb that was slain,
she is
dancing in the spotless grace,
singing in the newborn praise,
seeing with adoring gaze,
feeling the more perfect rays,
and now she quivers and says,
Oh I love how can I not?
When by His blood I am bought?
He loved me first,
oh those glorious words,
He loves me!

…and that’s what happens when I let my mind stray and wander and ponder the incomprehensible fact that…the Almighty God of the Universe loved me. How else can I respond but by saying…’Oh I love how can I not?’ I love my Father so. Oh I love Him!!!! If my tears could but grace His feet, I would weep for being so close to Him…my Lord and my God, I love Him so!!!!

apple orchards

I really want an apple pie right now. All hot and delicious and full of apple slices drenched in sugary goodness in a nice delicious crust…along with a cold glass of milk. Yes? Yes. Made by dad(the filling) and mom(the crust), specifically. Of course, this is now sadly impossible as they are thousands of miles away. Well maybe come Christmas time, this will be remedied. Until then, I will just have to dream…

And now that my craving for apple pie has increased exponentially after writing that, I will try to switch topics gracefully…by saying that it is a beautiful day here!! I am very happy that despite a week of mostly rain and wind and cold gloominess, Aberdeen has decided to reward us with a gorgeously sunny and refreshing Saturday! And of course, anthropomorphizing Aberdeen is foolish…I really want to thank God, for this is indeed the day that He has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it!!

And this has been a delightfully busy and hectic week! This week I think I’ve become fully immersed in my new job, as I had no lack of tasks to complete, from compiling quoting process maps to engaging the rest of the staff to form a comprehensive picture of affairs here. We have a consultant coming over from the States next week, so we’ve been prepping for that this week, as next week should be even crazier! But then, do you really want to hear about Cameron Drilling affairs? Probably not, so I’ll refrain.

But last night was not business, but pleasure! A couple from church invited me to their place for dinner last night, so me and my roommate went over(rewind – did I mention I now have a flatmate? He’s from Nigeria, and this is his first time out of the country! So it is most fun to use my lofty status as three-week resident of Scotland to show him around the city and introduce him to our crazy Western ways; he’s pretty awesome) – we left straight from work and through the driving rain and terrible traffic(Houston-esque, almost) I drove(wait, rewind again – did I also mention that Cameron hired me a car? Well they did – a Nissan Note – and so yesterday was my first day driving through Aberdeen! In the rain. And traffic. On the other side of the road. I’m still here!) to their house right near the University of Aberdeen. And wow, that was…an interesting sentence. Anyways, Josh and Emily have a lovely family(daughter Rebecca, son Luke) and they made taco salad for us! They’re actually from Texas(what!) and he’s here getting his doctorate in theology, particularly in regards to the doctrine of the Trinity and the view of the Trinity throughout church history and how that has been changing the past 200 years. Oh yeah, we got a little theologically nerdy. Anyways, it was simply an amazingly awesome night hanging out with them and relaxing and communing in the goodness of the Lord!! Afterwards me and Uche(my flatmate) drove back through the considerably more empty roads to our flat. Following that we had an ASDAs adventure to get him a phone so he could call his family(which he did – success!) and I called back home and got to talk to Laura for the first time in a while – hurrah! Finally, we made it home and sleep beckoned…I woke up this morning to hear Uche vacuuming our flat – see, I told you he’s awesome!

Ok, while I’ve been writing this, me and this woman two tables over from me(here at Starbucks) keep making eye contact. I’m not sure if she’s just intrigued at my furious tapping away or what.

ANYWAYS, I really need to get going soon, as later this afternoon is castle time! But a little sidetour first…

This morning I was walking to Starbucks enjoying the beautiful morning when a woman stopped me(old enough to be my grandmother, if not my great-grandmother!) holding out a tract, saying something about “the future kingdom”. I’m thinking, “Oh, she must be a Christian, yay!” So I mention that I follow Christ. She sort of brushes that off, which I find only a tad odd, and then ask me if I’m waiting for the coming kingdom. I enthusiastically agree and at this point she points me to a verse somewhere in John about Jesus pointing the way to God. John 3:17 maybe? Anyways, I make a remark affirming that, saying also, “And Jesus is God!” at which point she says, “Well, no, he isn’t…”

screeching halt

I had to drastically revise my approach at this point from friendly encourager to wary combatant. I responded to her heretical statement by saying, “Actually, He is God.” At which point we got into a nice little debate, with her pulling out what I assume are all the classic Jesus-is-not-God passages, starting with Colossians(why is it telling me Colossians is spelled wrong – hmph) 1. I think when I rebutted this by telling her what firstborn meant in the Greek, she may have begun to re-evaluate her opinion of me as a soft target. Anyways, I’m not going to recount our whole conversation except that I urged her to read John, as the whole purpose of that testimony is to put forth Jesus as God!! She denied that with some silly out-of-context verses, tried to reproach me on the illogical nature of the Trinity(1+1+1 can’t equal 1!) and eventually we parted ways. I think I would put our mini-debate as a draw, simply because neither of us were even slightly budging and I failed to pull out the ace verse of John 1:1. Oh why oh why did I not remember that until ten minutes later???

Anyways, the point of this whole recount isn’t to prove my theological acuity, because most assuredly, I felt like I was stumbling around….any good words I did say were of the Spirit. But I just wanted to express my sadness over her words and my acute anger at her denial of Jesus’ very divine nature as God Himself. I think this cut me the deepest, that someone would deny Christ as God, and then I think of all those every day who deny Christ. And I weep. And then I think of my own denials of Christ every day, even though I know Him!! And I weep bitterly. Oh for the lost ones of this world! I cannot wait for the day when faith truly shall be sight and He comes on the clouds for every eye to see Him. Every heart will be pierced and all will know Jesus as Lord. King of kings and Lord of Lords is His name. Amen and Amen!! Come Lord Jesus!

In the beginning was the Word,
and the Word was with God, and
the Word was God. He was in the
beginning with God. All things came
into being through Him, and apart from
Him nothing came into being that has
come into being. In Him was life, and
the life was the Light of men. The
Light shines in the darkness, and the
darkness did not comprehend it.

Some of the most beautiful words ever penned. Bar none.

Grace and peace be with y’all this most glorious day!

Bird of Prey

Remember this, and be assured;
Recall it to mind, you transgressors.
Remember the former things long past,
For I am God, and there is no other;
I am God, and there is no one like Me,
Declaring the end from the beginning,
And from ancient times things which have not been done,
Saying, ‘My purpose will be established,
And I will accomplish all My good pleasure’;
Calling a bird of prey from the east,
The man of My purpose from a far country
Truly I have spoken; truly I will bring it to pass.
I have planned it; surely I will do it.
Listen to me, you stubborn-minded,
Who are far from righteousness,
I bring near my righteousness, it is not far off;
And my salvation will not delay
And I will grant salvation in Zion,
And My glory for Israel.

-Isaiah 46:8-13

September 9th, 2010

Who will separate us from the love of Christ?
Will tribulation, or distress, or persecution,
or famine, or nakedness, or
peril, or sword? Just as it is written,
“FOR YOUR SAKE WE ARE BEING PUT TO
DEATH ALL DAY LONG;
WE ARE CONSIDERED AS SHEEP TO BE
SLAUGHTERED.”
But in all these things we overwhelmingly
conquer through Him
who loved us. For I am convinced
that neither death, nor life, nor angels,
nor principalities, nor things present,
nor things to come, nor powers, nor
height, nor depth, nor any other created
thing, will be able to separate us from
the love of God, which is in Christ
Jesus our Lord.

Now one of the Pharisees was requesting Him to dine with him, and
He entered the Pharisee’s house and reclined at the table. And there
was a woman in the city who was a sinner; and when she learned that He
was reclining at the table in the Pharisee’s house, she brought an
alabaster vial of perfume, and standing behind Him at His feet, weeping,
she began to wet His feet with her tears, and kept wiping them with the
hair of her head, and kissing His feet and anointing them with the
perfume. Now when the Pharisee who had invited Him saw this, he said
to himself, “If this man were a prophet He would know who and what sort
of person this woman is who is touching Him, that she is a sinner.”
And Jesus answered him, “Simon, I have something to say to you.” And
he replied, “Say it, Teacher.”
“A moneylender had two debtors: one owed five hundred denarii, and the
other fifty. When they were unable to repay, he graciously forgave them
both. So which of them will love him more?” Simon answered and said,
“I suppose the one whom he forgave more.” And He said to him, “You have
judged correctly.” Turning toward the woman, He said to Simon, “Do you
see this woman? I entered your house; you gave Me no water for My feet,
but she has wet My feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You
gave Me no kiss; but she, since the time I came in, has not ceased to kiss
My feet. You did not anoint My head with oil, but she anointed My feet
with perfume. For this reason I say to you, her sins, which are many,
have been forgiven, for she loved much; but he who is forgiven little,
loves little.” Then He said to her, “Your sins have been forgiven.”
Those who were reclining at the table with Him began to say to themselves,
“Who is this man who even forgives sins?” And He said to the woman,
“Your faith has saved you; go in peace.”

-Luke 8:36-50

I cannot say anything to add to the beauty of these words. But oh how these words have touched my heart! I ask myself, how much have I been forgiven? And the answer is clear. I have been forgiven…everything. Oh how great is my love for my Saviour!! If only I were in His presence and could kiss His feet. If only I could kneel and hug his feet to myself! Oh I would cry for love! I have sinned much. I have sinned completely. And I have been forgiven much. I have been forgiven completely. Oh the beauty! Oh I could weep!