A quiet night ahead hurrah! It’s been raining on and off all day and while I’m grateful that we don’t need fear a drought anytime soon, I am a little bit tired of the constant wetness, I must confess. Someday soon perhaps the sun will show her face again. I have hopes! Now though I’m grateful for a night in which a hearty dinner shall be enjoyed and Dani and I can sit and be still and rest. So thankful for nights such as this. I would like to do some creative writing at some point, but my brain is starting to tick down and I don’t feel like my reserves have enough left to fire off the creative engines. Ah I sigh. I do feel that writing would do me ever so much good but I just don’t trust myself to write anything worthy. Of course, it’s not always about worthiness, true? I have had this thought before. Sometimes simply the stretching of one’s imagination and allowing oneself to run on down the path is enough, no matter the destination and no matter if the castle fades to mist a few hours down the line. So instead I think I will allow myself to enjoy a quiet night in which my mind settles more comfortably into this achingly wistful mood and my body relaxes on the couch in which I sit. I shall perhaps sip on something cold and let my eyes dance down a page of a favourite book. It is good to rest, is it not?
Tag: life
Splish Splash
Hello friends! Saturday here and it has been a productive one thus far. I am pleased. A nice walk down MKT way when I woke up. Yes it felt like a sauna, but was still lovely to stretch my legs and wake up both in body and mind. Following, a bit of coffee and reading time. And then? Dani and I got to work! It had been far too long since we’d had a good deep-cleaning session, so it was time. She worked on kitchen and bathroom and I moved furniture and cleaned all the long-rooted dust and dirt and debris that had made its home in all the dark undisturbed crevices of our little domicile. A few hours later, we feel tired yet happy. A good morning’s work. Now? I rest for a minute here on the couch and soon we shall gallivant off somewhere in town. But figured I’d grab the spare minute here and write a few words on my latest read.
48. The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss. Oh I do love this book. I felt in the mood for a comfy and beautiful fantasy recently and realized I hadn’t read this one in a while. Picked it up off the shelf and sunk into it and…yup, every bit as good as I remembered. I don’t care about all the fuss about this being an incomplete series and likely never to be finished, etc. Even so, this book is a worthy read and always makes me happy. Reading it now a good 15 years since I first read it, I can recognize that I’ve grown a bit in mind and soul and there are parts of this book that make me roll my eyes a bit as I recognize the immaturity of the boy at the center of this one. Yet Kvothe is quite young and so I suppose it’s proper? I simply love the style in which Rothfuss writes – it’s lovely and poetic and he has such a way with words. Yes, the tone can be a bit condescending and overwrought at times, but even then I don’t care all that much – the moments and scenes that Rothfuss describes are just so beautiful. There are several sequences in this book that pull at my heart strings almost every time and near on make me weep for beauty. This isn’t a perfect book but I shan’t point out the minor imperfections now. I still love this one and firmly believe it’s one of the finest fantasy works written in the past thirty years. I honestly can’t think of a better one at the moment.
Small Things
Hello friends! Quick Wednesday morning post before work kicks up into high gear. Most grateful that my body was able to wake up so expeditiously this morning and I enjoyed a lovely long time of reading as I sipped my coffee. Read one of my all-time fav passages (Psalm 27! Always oh so encouraging) and also some beautiful words in Isaiah and Matthew. Bonus reading in John Owen Vol. 7 – still plugging away, I think I’m almost halfway done! Though the current material on apostasy isn’t quite as warming for my soul as some of the previous reading I’ve done in Owen, still good and needful words contained therein. Finally rolled on towards the office here and arrived only five minutes past six. I suppose that may be an absurd start time to some, but I do love mornings and getting an early start is never a bad thing. Now I take small sips of the slightly subpar work coffee and prepare for a busy day. I am tempted to sigh and fret as I consider what approaches, yet no. I lift my eyes to heaven and acknowledge the God who is and lift my voice to heaven and thank the God who cares. Let’s think on love and beauty this fine day. Have a lovely one, dear friends!
Forty Eight
Hello friends! A Sunday afternoon post here. I am freshly showered and feel cool and clean and it is truly delightful, especially after the last hour I spent outside sweating vigorously in the glorious steam bath that is our weather here in June just now. Not sure why I’ve been in such a walking mood lately, but that’s now two walks for the day. Went for my usual Sunday walk immediate upon waking this morning. The sun wasn’t quite peeking over the trees yet still the humidity bid me a hearty hello. But I did love the walk and it did me good before I eventually came back and had my pre-church coffee and reading time. Then this past hour? I could have and probably should have just sat down and enjoyed the cool of the flat this Sunday afternoon. Instead for some reason I was itching to move and be outside and so I went out and let my legs stride on. A little 3 mile walk, ho hum. But it was good. Chatted with Earnie on the phone the whole time, which was glorious indeed. It has been oh so long since we’ve had a proper chat and it was very much encouraging to my soul. Now? I think reading time approaches. Candle is already lit and flickering on the table and soon I shall turn on some music. No more World Cup games on right now, alas!! I have been much enjoying all the World Cup action lately. Group stages which means multiple games every day and it’s just fantastic! The US team (surprisingly somehow) played a very adequate opener game against Paraguay. 4-1 and 3 points, hurrah! On to Australia. Yesterday Dani and I went went down with Angela and Lauren to a downtown bar that was swarmed with Brasilians and we cheered on Brasil with all our might. Alas they managed only a draw against Morocco. Well, Morocco is a strong team. Or at least that’s what we keep telling ourselves. And last night, Scotland grabbed 3 points against Haiti!! Oh Scotland let’s go!!! Though I don’t have high hopes of them going deep (especially with Brasil & Morocco both in their group), I’m hoping they make it to knockouts. We shall see. But that’s enough football talk for now I suppose. I do love the World Cup though and it makes me so happy that we have so many games upcoming these next few weeks!! Even today, there was a game actually played in Houston! (Germany vs. Curacao) Just wish the ticket prices were slightly less expensive. Ah well. Now I’m off for real. Sorry for all the rambling, maybe I shall write something more substantial in a bit. Peace and love, my friends.
Breakfast
Hello friends and happy Friday! It’s been a bit and thought I’d bring back that old classic – an early morning pre-work post! Not promising I’ll say anything profound of course, just thought I’d dash out a few lines and say hello. I’m ever so grateful for a work-from-home day this Friday. Been a busy past few days at the office and so to have a day at home today is truly a joy. Already about done with my first cup of coffee and thinking it’s almost time to brew my second. But right now, enjoying a few quiet moments of peace.
It is good to be still and silent and meditate on life and all that has come before and all that now is and all that is yet to be. At times I feel we can be oh so busy dashing between this errand and that appointment and this event and that outing that we have no time to reflect and ponder. I confess that is not usually my weakness – some could say I have too much time to think and write! Yet I would still argue that we do such a good job filling our time that there is not those in between spaces that are so valuable to the health and growth of our own minds and souls. Those in between spaces are when our minds wander down those little paths and think thoughts that may turn out to be ever so fruitful. Of course not always. Sometimes we let our minds dance into thickets and briar patches that are not quite as amenable to our thriving! But still the point stands that we need to be careful how we are filling our time. Or how we are allowing our time to be filled. Even think of that ever present quite helpful device the phone. When we are at the store in line or in the elevator or just on the couch trying to read…how often do we pull out the phone on autopilot idly scrolling away at whatever the algorithm has decided to present to us that moment? And so we allow our minds to be filled and occupied by much that is not ideal. I am attempting to be more purposeful on what I think on. Ought we not think on what is good and true and lovely and meditate more on the real and beautiful instead of letting our minds pick at the vacuous fripperies that are shoved our way?
So today let’s think on the beautiful. I want to ponder how much I have been blessed and meditate on the God who made me and all things. I want to think more of Christ and the beauties contained in his work and word and all the glories he has brought me as he bought me with the blood he shed oh so many years ago. I want to think on that greater story that makes all else fade as I consider the solidity and reality of the fact that I am a child of God. What a wonder it is to consider the anchor that holds me fast as I know I am held and loved by the God who calls my name. Though too often I fear the storms of life and let anxiety fill my heart as I wonder what is to come, I need not fear. The storms may howl and the winds may wail yet no matter all the water that slops in the boat, I am confident that this boat in which I sit will never sink and that it will never run aground. Only someday I look forward to when we land on that far shore and I step out on the beach with heart exultant, eager for a good breakfast of fish and toast and communion with the one for whom my heart longs. Now we know in part – one day we shall know fully just as we are fully known. Peace and love, my friends. Peace and love.
Upon the Brow
Hello friends! A quick little post this evening before I dive into a bit of reading. I have just started a re-read of Name of the Wind and oh I had forgotten how much I love it. I am delighted anew as I read the words dance across the page. Yes this series may never be finished but I’m ok with that – the beauty in this book alone is enough. So yes, reading time awaits. It’s been raining much of the day and so it’s been that grey kind of day that lingers in the bones and makes one linger in the moment and ponder what’s come before. I am happy though and even pleased that I got to write a bit earlier (scroll down). Don’t take any of it overly seriously – all the writings were just little pieces of imagination attempting to let my creativity do something worthwhile for once. Not entirely sure I succeeded with any of them, alas. Especially the poems were something dreadful now that I look at them in the harsh light after the fever has worn off. I don’t know what’s going on, poetry used to be my bread and butter and now it seems a bit drab and off and doesn’t flow as well as it used to. My prose is where I live these days and I suppose I’m grateful for that. But I’m tempted to focus on poetry more now just to see if I can reclaim the flame and dash off some lines that make me smile even after the fact. We shall see, we shall see. Anyway, I’ve talked far too much about writing and not even sure why I decided to write this piece at all. But I will let it live, I suppose. Thoughts on the page are a reflection of lightning in the mind and I am grateful to have these odd writings to look at after a time. Whenever James-of-the-future re-reads this, he will maybe be puzzled at the existence of these lines yet I urge him to think that in this moment I feel at peace and oh so very alive. It is these quiet moments where the candle crackles and the music floats across the room and I look to see my wife smiling to herself that I cannot deny the magic of this life that I somehow have been graciously given. It is good for us to be here.
Harp Song
Silver water slides underneath the bridge and I feel an urgent desire to shed my shirt and shoes and jump right in. Usually I can push off mad thoughts such as this but not this time. Off comes my shirt and off come my shoes and I climb over the railing and balance on the lip of the bridge. I stretch my back and legs and then push slowly up once as I hold on loosely to the rail behind. The sun beats hot upon my head and I feel the sweat begin to trickle down my neck. The swift water below looks absolutely delicious. I once more slowly press down upon the bridge with my toes and then I force myself past the point of no return and off I leap. The water rushes toward me as my stomach leaps in protest as I have a half second to wonder if I’ve perhaps made a mistake. Never mind! My feet hit the water and my flailing arms and head soon follow. Ah I am cool and I am washed and oh boy is it cold! I immediately splutter to the surface even as I feel the water rush me onwards. I let it. I’m floating backwards and can’t quite see where I’m going but I know the river runs straight for a good half mile at least and I’m not overly concerned of stray rowboats. So I lie back and let the waters carry me on as I feel the sun smile down upon me. Its warmth feels good now. I am a part of the river and the river is a part of me and together we in unison dance with the sky above and the breeze that leaps between. It is a good dance, a rollicking affair. I am not at all mad about my choice, no matter what Madeleine may say later on. Up on that bridge I was a remote observer, standing upon concrete and mind elsewhere. Now? I am living true as the river carries me on. My mind is in the moment and present and oh so focused on the fact that I am in this river and I am breathing fresh air and I feel cold and hot at the same time and it is glorious and I hear creation’s song.
That Peculiar Summery Shade of Green
Hello friends! It is Memorial Day and while I’m grateful to not have a full day of work, Dani and I are both a bit saddened that our sick and weary bodies are keeping us from enjoying a proper day off. Ah well. I had a nice little walk when I woke up this morning (walking the MKT trail before 7am is always fun – you see the real ones!) and Dani and I went for a grocery store run a few hours back, but apart from that? We have had a most lazy and quiet day. I guess that’s good? My chest congestion continues to linger and annoyingly enough I’d even guess I have a small fever just now. But someday I pray my body shall recover and I will feel healthy again. Someday! I’d also like to write something creatively. Perhaps after I dash off a couple quick book reviews. It made me happy yesterday to write a little prose, as feeble as it is at times. Ah writing always relaxes and invigorates my mind. I need more such sessions. But as I seem to be rambling on without end, let me talk a bit about a couple books and then we shall see if my rambling extends to more poetical endeavors.
43. The Seven Dials Mystery by Agatha Christie. It had been far too long since I’d read a Christie, and after finding a few new ones I’d not read before at local used book shop, was hankering to dive right in! This one scratched the itch and it made me happy (albeit confused) as I read. Christie is her usual masterful self in this one. All new characters in this – not a Marple or Poirot to be found! – and I enjoyed as always the little window into 1920s Britain. The slang is always amusing and I don’t know, I just enjoy seeing the interactions between the young men and women in this – made me realize that things haven’t changed that much in the past 100 years! The mystery was solid too – though I did get a little suspicious partway through and half-guess the villain, it wasn’t by any means obvious. Typical Christie finish here, with plenty of twists and turns and very satisfying denouement. Glad I picked this one up.
44. A Ring of Endless Light by Madeleine L’Engle. In the mood for something homey and real and encouraging, I grabbed this from the shelf as it’d been a while since I’d read it. It was exactly what the doctor ordered. Full of L’Engle’s typical mix of the mundane and the ethereal, I found myself quickly engrossed in this tale of a young girl growing up one summer as all changes around her. I love the family dynamics in this one, I love the conversations, I even somehow love the various interactions Vicky has with her 3(!!) suitors, even though I think I remember that annoying me first time around. I do love how L’Engle writes dialogue and back-and-forth conversations about serious matters. Though I don’t always agree with some of the particulars of L’Engle’s theology, I love how she asks the questions and truly engages with the possibilities raised by this broken wounded world we live in and a God who is real. This book also has L’Engle’s penchant for the strange and beautiful as we vicariously thrill through Vicky as she swims with dolphins and touches the faint after-images of the divine touch on creation’s weave. This book isn’t perfect and there is one character in particular I really don’t quite like – oh Zachary Gray! – but at the end of the day reading this book was a comfort and joy to me. We need more books like this in the world.
Sabbath Meditation
I sometimes wish I lived in a little cottage at the top of a cliff overlooking the sea. It sounds picturesque, does it not? Imagine hearing the waves crash ceaselessly against the rocks far below. Look far out across the grey sea and smile as you imagine the sunset that is soon to be. Take a walk in the garden and feel the wind whip against your shoulders as you hear the gulls cry in melodious cacophony. Well, perhaps strike that last. But still, can you imagine sitting on the porch of your little cottage watching the soft rain fall and with a book upon your lap breathing deep the sea air? Perhaps you have a little lantern next to you for that light which becomes necessary as the sky slowly darkens. And inside you know the pot of tomato sauce bubbles away and perfumes the air for the moment when you shall step back inside to stir and inhale the scents of garlic and oregano. I think of what it would be like to have a cottage as I have described and I smile. Maybe someday. But also I know there are drawbacks to such a life. How far away the grocery store, I wonder? Perhaps thirty minutes, perhaps more! And if it is storming, of course I would not risk the muddy drive. And where are my closest friends? Perhaps not nearby. I would be lonely at times, lonely enough that my heart be sore to hurting. And the nearest library would be quite a distance away and I would know all the books on all the shelves by the sixth month, surely. But then, I suppose in this little cottage of mine I could build quite the cosy little library, could I not? So no disadvantage that.
But still my heart yearns for a quiet little home on a cliffside far away. Though at times I would miss those whom my heart holds dear, still it would do me good to gaze upon the beauty of that wine-dark sea each and every day. There is something in my soul that craves such. I would love to walk the garden path and lift my eyes to the stars above and pray to God aloud and relish the fact that He hears me true and sets his hand upon me in firm affirmation of my place at his feet. But then, I suppose I need not a cottage for that last. I can even now on my couch in this little city apartment raise my eyes to heaven and cry out to the God who knows my name. Maybe someday I’ll have this cottage to call my home sweet home. But for the now, I smile and rest in the fact that eternal life is mine no matter where this feeble frame resides. Someday I shall receive the call that even now eternity in my heart prepares me for. Someday I shall walk the garden path with the God who knows my name. Someday soon even I shall see that perfect beauty for which my soul longs. Someday I shall look into the eyes of Jesus.
Precipitation
I have been procrastinating writing all day. It is truly tragic, is it not? One has time to write and write finally for the first time in a long time and then for some perverse reason the will decides to keep choosing other things to do instead. It is maddening, truly. So now the afternoon winds on and I had almost decided it was time to do some dinner prep but then I told myself no that it would not do and that I would write something, even if the output turns out to be quite execrable.
I really wish I could go for a nice walk. It’s been a few days since I’ve stretched my legs properly and it irks me that I feel oh so sedentary in this moment. Yet the rain has been pouring and pouring and though now it seems it’s stopped, I do not trust the sky and I shall not risk the walk, quite certain that more storms shall be rolling o’er head shortly. So. I write! What shall I write? It’s been a long week, what with me and Dani being properly sick and miserable. It’s a garden variety cold/cough for me, but Dani’s been hit much harder. Right now I’m just grateful if she’s able to keep any food or liquids down. Praying for her recovery – oh please Lord, heal her. I suppose it’s normal after a vacation for the body to finally collapse upon arriving home again, mm? Definitely our bodies have been through a lot these past few weeks, what with traveling to Italy (Rome & Positano!) and Greece (Santorini!) and I am quite a terrible chronicler in that I really should detail some of our adventures in the aforesaid, yet I can’t quite bring myself to open the spigot. Instead, I’ll close this little post and then ponder if my creative self can decide to write anything more poetic and dreamy than the dreary prose that has trickled forth thus far.
I really am in a mood, aren’t I? Yet I do long to write something beautiful. I am not quite certain if I can. Yet even if I can’t, it is good to sit here at home, dry and warm on a day when outside is damp and stormy. I will perhaps do some dinner prep now – classic burritos with tomato/avocado salad! – and then see if any writing is to be. Peace and love, my friends. Peace and love.
