And we come to it at last, a Sunday almost worthy of all the acclaim. I wish my pen had ink sufficient to write all that I wish to describe, my mind thoughts clarified sufficiently to impart them to the page here and now. Alas my pen is dull and my mind distracted and so I feel most ill fitted to the task to talk of that which most fills my heart. Is that not the way of it at times? Alas, alas. Yet still I must write. For my soul burns within me as I consider this day that is used as a fitting marker to celebrate the reason for which I live. Some call it Easter, some call it Resurrection Sunday, some have their own reasons for not celebrating it at all. For me, I simply delight that there is a day still commonly known as a day we look back to the point in time – real time, defined time – in which a man that was dead came to life. And this was not a cheap trick or temporary reprieve from that most ghastly enemy death, nay, this was a conquering triumph, a resurrection that was a turning of the tide, a proclamation that the grave no longer had any power, death no longer had any sting. For on a certain day on this very earth not that long ago as one reckons time, the man Jesus Christ rose from the dead with the power and authority that verily spoke to the fact that he was not simply a man, but God Himself, the very essence and fullness of God who had been made flesh and now walked upon this earth in a body the like the world had never seen – a resurrected body in all its glory – pointing to a hope that for those who call upon the name of Jesus will never fade nor fail. Indeed – we all who call ourselves Christians rejoice in the verity of the resurrection and delight in the hope that is ours – bought with the blood of Christ and set aside as a people to the very Lord of the universe, we too have a future that is free of death and pain, better than that, a life that will be lived forever with our Lord. Oh what glory, oh what joy! I cannot proper do justice to the song that fills my heart. All I can say now is glory hallelujah. Sometimes I cannot quite believe that God died for me. Sometimes I cannot quite believe that to accomplish this fact, my God hung bleeding on a tree. Yet I look back and sing of resurrection story and cannot deny the truth. My God loved me, my God chose me, my God set his hand upon me and declared me beloved son. What can my fickle heart say in response? Perhaps my pen isn’t quite dry, not yet. Perhaps my mind isn’t quite empty, not yet. Perhaps my song this eve is one granted to me by the God who made the stars who sing along in triumphant harmony. Perhaps – nay, for truth – I am one who can now rest secure in my God’s promised eternal security. It is a thing of beauty that my God hath wrought. I can but look upon it and cry out in praise, that my God has seen fit that justice and mercy might kiss each other at that cursed tree. Jesus Christ is my risen Lord – for now and all eternity.
Tag: god
Tower of the Moon
Quick book thoughts this Monday morn.
25. How Long, O Lord? by D.A. Carson. A superbly brilliant book on evil and suffering. Carson looks at a topic that is not an easy one and with a pastoral heart and incisive mind attempts to put forth a Christian framework for understanding the horrors we daily see around us in this world in which we live. I would argue that Carson succeeds and my heart was very much encouraged reading this one. This is one of the biggest problems many people have with the idea of God or of Christianity. If there is a God that is so loving, then why evil? Then why suffering? Then why so many horrible things do I see on the news each and every day? Carson does not diminish or downplay the evils we see in this world, if anything, some of the examples he gives of severe suffering and loss are almost too much to read. Yet Carson also very much wants to look at this hard topic from a Biblical perspective and explore what the Bible has to say about suffering and evil but most importantly of all, what does the Bible say about the God who is in the midst of us, even now sustaining and holding this world together through his sovereign power. Does the presence of God in this world mean he smiles upon the darkness that swirls over the face of it? May it never be. Does the presence of evil upon the world that God has made mean God is incapable of holding it back? May it never be. Does this impinge upon the nature of God and the love that we so rightly ascribe to Him? Absolutely not.
This book is one that I shall revisit. Carson does not write this book as a balm or aid for those currently going through suffering (a fact that he reiterates), but rather – he writes this book as a preventative, a book to aid the Christian in understanding the problem of evil and suffering and how the God we worship yet reigns, rules and loves us still. This book is written to give us a higher idea of God and yet still encourage us that we have a Father who cares for even the smallest concern we have. The author acknowledges and leans into the mysteries that we cannot now fully understand (if ever) and is so concerned to rightly place those mysteries, which he locates in the very nature of God which our limited minds cannot fully grasp. The author is very much concerned that we not assign to God that which is not assigned to Him in Scripture and he is very much concerned that we do not contradict that about God which is fully asserted in Scripture. I very much appreciate Carson’s reliance and leaning into the Scriptural text and how it informs us of the God who is.
This is not a book written for those who do not know and love God, though I think it would be an interesting book for a non-Christian to read as it gives an insight into the Christian perspective on evil and suffering and how we as Christians grapple with such. For myself, I found myself profoundly encouraged by this one and seek to use it as Carson intended, strengthening and buttressing my understanding of this topic so that even as I go through trials and tribulations in my life yet to come, I will have a Biblical understanding of suffering and the God who is yet present. The chapter on Job alone was worth the price of admission. Very grateful for authors who write with such clarity of thought yet also such an overflow of empathy and compassion, even seeking to show us how we can best be with those who are suffering even now. It is rare to find such a balance. I cannot recommend this one enough.
Smokestacks
Another Monday begins. What this week brings who can tell? Or at the least, I can say for certainty not I. A bit of uncertainty, a bit of anxiety as we slide headfirst into April into chaos looming. But is not all of life a bit of chaos, heedlessly unconstrained by the chains that we so meticulously fasten around our plans in order to bring about our own designs? We think at times that if we plan just so and schedule in such and such a fashion that we might then truly have our lives set aright and in smooth and careful steps proceed accordingly to our will. We would be as gods. Yet all of life goes to prove us wrong. We take firm steps and we plan. This is good. Yet on this sea that tosses violently there is only one who can of his own accord calm it. Not I, never I. Is that not a bit reassuring? It is to me and you may wonder why. It is simple – I am every day shown how feeble and frail are my strivings. If the path of my life was up to me alone, I would have good reason to be terrified at the outcome. For I know the deep and lingering darkness in myself as well as the storm that howls round about. It is not a good thing to be left to one’s own devices. And so on this slowly waking morning, I look anew to the horizon grateful for my soul’s own mooring. I trust not in myself for myself, thanks be to God! Instead I trust in the one who never fails and never flees. I trust in Jesus Christ who gave his life for me. This is true and this is real and this actuality of salvation which has occurred is more solid looming in my mind than any imagined pain or hurt. I linger in wondering awe at the foot of this long dreamed hill and watch the flowers grow.
Lovingly She Said
23. Meditation and Communion with God by John Jefferson Davis. A really rather wonderful book on the reality that is true communion with God. It is easy to say trite phrases such as “God with us” or “When two or more gather in my name, there am I with them” and nod our heads and think yes of course we are Christians and we acknowledge that God is real and God is with us. But what do these truths actually mean? How can we understand ontologically what it means to be found in Christ? In a deeper philosophical sense, what does it mean that the Holy Spirit is within us and somehow someway working in us? How can as Christians meditate in a way that is healthy, theologically sound and yet also profoundly real? This book is a wonderful essay thinking through some of these questions in a way which speaks to my soul. I confess, I first read this book some 12 years ago now – when I was still residing in Aberdeen! – and I remember being much moved by it and giving it pride of place on my bookshelf. I have not read it since then and recently as I’ve been meditating more and more on the reality of what it means to abide in Christ, I wanted to give this book another whirl and see how it struck me this time. Well I will confess that apparently either I have not changed that much (false, to be sure) or this book really does hold some pretty profound truths – and wonderfully incisive phrasings to hit home – on the nature of our communion with the true God. This book is not exactly an easy read – there are some concepts that are quite difficult to get your mind around. But is that not only proper? Though I found some of the metaphors a bit wonky and maybe less helpful than the author intended (I really could have done with less of the Skype metaphor!), I do appreciate the effort the author took to try and clearly communicate what it means that we in actuality participate in the work of Christ in a real and abiding sense, just as we in actuality participate in heavenly realities in a way which is more real than we fully now understand. The author does a wonderful job of discussing some heady concepts in a way that enflamed my soul with awe as I considered the truths of being a new creation through the work of God in my life. The author also dives deep into what meditation can look like and how it can be practiced in a way which is both biblical and grounded while also very and almost mystically real. I don’t claim to fully understand how God is constantly at work in those who are his, but I can say with confidence that this book was a wonderful aid to my pondering the truths of God and His works in our lives. And I loved the strong Trinitarian theme that runs throughout! Again, the author does not shy away from hard sayings! Instead, the author digs into the Scriptural texts and seeks to bring out their truths into the modern age. Yes, there are a few sayings and quotations in this book that perhaps make me nervous, such as his quoting of persons from a very diverse set of Christian persuasions, yet I cannot find fault with this author for being willing to learn from those who may not come exactly from one narrow stream of Christian thought. At the end of the day, I appreciated the fact that this book was soaked in Scripture and written by one who most clearly knows God and seeks to know Him more. Oh how I long to seek my God thus – and this book mightily encouraged me in that quest and gave me such a sweet desire to draw closer to my God.
24. Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis. A remarkably unique book. I have not read this book in many years – I believe since my college days! – and I recently felt a desire to read some more Lewis and realized I had this book on my shelf and simply must revisit! It was interesting reading it now and I had to be careful to not be overly critical at times! As always with Lewis, I am always finding little things here and there that I don’t quite agree with and sometimes the way he approaches a question feels a bit forced and sometimes I was wishing for more Scripture! Yet! That last complaint especially is a silly one, as I realise that Lewis is writing this book (or rather – gave a series of talks) primarily to talk to those who do not yet know Christ and certainly would not respond well to a scriptural quote-fest! This book is an apologetic book, walking one through the journey of considering the possibility of God and what that may mean to our lives on this earth, particularly if this God turned out to be the Christian one that has been shown to us in the revelation of His Word, firstly in the person of Christ and secondarily in the inspired Scriptures. Lewis’ style is – as always – a delight. It’s simple yet deep, bracing yet fatherly. We get a sense here that Lewis is genuinely trying to tell us something that he actually believes is really true. Which. Yes. In pondering this book, part of me is annoyed that Lewis doesn’t come out and say things more forcefully at times. Yet is that not purposeful? Lewis here is not trying to outline in detail a particular line of dogma. He very clearly states up front that he’s not calling for one denomination or sect as true or false and he also very clearly states – again, aggravatingly at times – that he believes most traditions have their validities and can lead to God. Yet this book is about giving someone the opportunity to ask questions about the nature (or even possibility) of God and then gently guiding them down the path of what this then must necessarily entail. I love it for that. This is a book I can easily recommend to someone and then say – read this then let’s talk for a while. This book doesn’t have all the answers – really, what book does? – but it is a marvelous primer for one who is wondering about God and thinks that maybe there’s something out there? Yes, it’s a tad dated now, written near on 90 years ago, and so maybe Lewis doesn’t quite talk or write in the way it would be the most helpful for those of us in the 21st century. Still though? There is definitely utility to this one and as always with Lewis, there are those sentences and paragraphs that shine with the most brilliant clarity and truth that you take a gasp in awe. So many nuggets that Lewis just casually drops in front of us. I could go on and on with some quibbles here and there, but really, I don’t want to debate Lewis on the details here, because the point of this book is to point us in the direction of a real God who really communicates to us and who really, truly wants to be in communion with us so that we can in actuality be transformed into who we are truly meant to be – sons and daughters of God. What this means we cannot now know, but we eagerly wait for the day when all shall be revealed. Lewis talks about real things as being real things. If God is real, what does that mean for us? What shall we do with that information? That’s a good question. I shall end with some of Lewis’ own words, which I feel will be far more valuable than my own.
“Even in literature and art, no man who bothers about originality will ever be original: whereas if you simply try to tell the truth (without caring twopence how often it has been told before) you will, nine times out of ten, become original without ever having noticed it. The principle runs through all life from top to bottom. Give up yourself, and you will find your real self. Lose your life and you will save it. Submit to death, death of your ambitions and favourite wishes every day and death of your whole body in the end: submit with every fibre of your being, and you will find eternal life. Keep back nothing. Nothing that you have not given away will be really yours. Nothing in you that has not died will ever be raised from the dead. Look for yourself, and you will find in the long run only hatred, loneliness, despair, rage, ruin, and decay. But look for Christ and you will find Him, and with Him everything else thrown in.”
The Man Who Had Died Came Forth
Oh how glorious a time it was this morning at church, surrounded by hundreds who lifted up their voices and sang to our God on high. We sang his praises and lifted up our hands to the one who saves us and offers us eternal life with him. And indeed as our final words rang out ascribing glory to our Lord, I couldn’t help but imagine what it would be one day when surrounded not by hundreds but by thousands (and many myriads of thousands more) when we sing with faces blazing in the light that is shining from the face of God. One day this will be true in the kind of sense that our slow and creeping minds cannot now quite comprehend. One day for true our lives will flicker to the rhythm of a new song, indeed a song that will never end. Our voices will sing holy holy holy to the one who was and the one who is and the one who is to come. And we will see the Lamb of God with our own eyes and our new scribed bodies quiver with the bliss that is only right for those who are called true sons. Oh how glorious a day that will be and now I meditate on that moment when the kingdom is finally fully here in a way it can never be right now. For sure this kingdom is partially now but still not yet culminated is the final resurrection and the moment when the angels cry glory as they see the glory that has been won. But think now on these thoughts that fill my mind and I muse in uplifted wonder that even now in this quiet moment on my quiet couch I write in the presence of very God. His Spirit fills me even as he has sealed me and peace floods my soul. Now my voice whispers glory glory oh glorify your name. And in a small still voice printed on these pages I see written that he has and that he will. And so forever do I cherish the indisputable fact that I now reside in shocking sonship of the very God to whom my soul longs to forever cling. Ever confident in the blood that Jesus shed for me I can now only cry glory glory glory glory to my King.
Symphonic
This morning I sit on my couch for a few minutes and feel oh so thankful for all the little blessings that continually attend me. It is easy to feel confident in my own accomplishments and gathered goods and say that I have done this, that I have sowed and reaped and gathered and all that I possess is because I have done this or that. But really? What do I have that has not been given to me? What do I possess that I can claim is mine and mine alone? Am I so bold and sovereign to claim that I alone am the master of all that I survey? This is where the introspective soul looks inward and can potentially quail in terror and think that if I have no sovereignty in my own life, what then do I have and of what worth am I? Am I a worm, am I an ephemeral note upon the breeze, a dusting of moss upon the rock facing seaside? And then I look outward and see that I nakedly cling to this rock of a planet that rotates swift and moves in ordered dance throughout the seemingly void space of universal tapestry of being and wonder at my pride that I should think I am of any worth whatsoever when I possess the most miniscule fraction of energetic ability to do anything whatsoever in the momentary life that I lay claim to as birthright. So to combine the two – the inward look at self and worth or lack thereof and the outward look into the immensity of the chaotic void – and what do we come up with but sheer existential terror. It is not entirely a bad thing to be reminded of one’s place in the cosmos, but one must also understand the totality of being and realize there has been revelation of truth if we would have the eyes to see. This revelation echoes in the masterpiece of the heavens and in the conscience that whispers within and even now we hear music on the wind as we stand on the cliff at the edge of the sea and breathe deep of the rich oxygen that has been bestowed upon us by a being too great to comprehend by my aching broken mind. Because yes, this is where I stop looking in and stop looking out and simply stand still and wait to see the face of God. All I have seen in this life is a testimony to the existence of a being beyond myself that has in itself all sovereignty and inherent glory that I cannot claim as mine. I rejoice in that self-evident truth and sigh in satisfaction knowing that I can rest in God. There is nothing I claim as mine own even though my own pride weeps at the thought. Instead I look to the one who made me and acknowledge His claims to all including me. What can I claim? I can claim an inheritance that comes from calling this God my Father – and that is a mystery too wonderful to truly grasp. For how does this come about – acknowledging the eternal being that is God – that I should be his son? It is simple and it is fact and I do not have time to get into all the specifics, but I can be called a son because there was another, one who stepped out of the corridors of the eternal and clothed himself with the raiment of humanity and in a time-bound moment bled real blood and died a real death that I might receive eternal life and be clothed myself with the garments of immortality and receive an inheritance far too rich to be hoped or dreamed of – a life forever in communion with this God who my soul so longs for. And so as the chaotic void was brought to order with the introduction of a word, so the whirling existential dread of my life is brought to peace with the incarnation of this Word, God became flesh – this Jesus Christ who is my forever song. Amen, hallelujah, may my joy never cease. And it never will, but only heighten – for someday soon, someday soon, I shall in my own perfected flesh with my own perfected eyes look upon the risen Christ and quiver at the eternity that before me lies.
Interstitial
One little book review squeezed in this balmy February afternoon.
12. the practice of the presence of God by Brother Lawrence. This book was most beneficial and good for my soul. I think it is a book I shall return to from time to time. It is a very tiny book (in both square footage and page count!) but I deliberately slowed my reading pace and stretched this out over a week and a half or so, reading a few pages each night. It is a book that some may scoff at or call simple and that others may gaze warily at suspecting it contains content that is overly mystical and potentially dangerous. I read this and took this book as what I think it was intended to be – a call to be more constantly in communion with our God as we recognize the reality of his presence and the wonder of his love for his children that he has called to himself. Oh how encouraging it is to meditate on the word and work of God! This book is a simple one, written in language that seems old-fashioned and (dare I say) childish at times. Yet the truth contained therein is that which angels marvel at. I’m grateful to read the words and convictions of one monk who spent most of his life seeking to be close to God at all times even in (especially in!) the mundane and everyday activities that at times sap us so. This book encouraged me and convicted me both. I ought spend more time in prayer and constant conversation with my God. I ought form habits that pull me towards such divine contemplation and an intimate realized knowledge that God is real and that He is with me. Do we really believe in God? Do we really believe he is one who is listening and longing to hear our prayers? If so, then why are we not doing more to cultivate and delight in the greatest relationship we will ever have – that of an adopted son and daughter of the living God with this very being himself. I’m grateful to this book for reminding me of such, and of being an aid to renew and spur my hunger and thirst for righteousness – this righteousness only fully realized in saving faith and relationship with Jesus Christ my Lord. Yes at times I read the words of this book and thought – of course it is easy for Brother Lawrence to do this, he’s in a monastery! Excuses excuses. May I more fully and deeply plunge into the deep and true river that is a glorious eternal knowledge and relationship with my God. This book points me towards thinking more of God and less of self, and for that I am grateful. May we ever delight in the most beautiful reality that there could be – eternal peace with God.
Trembling
How precious it is to be a child of God. Sometimes I feel like I know it, sometimes the feeling flees so far away, that I wouldn’t be surprised if it was on the other side of the Atlantic. Most thankfully my status as a child of God does not depend on my feelings. If it did, I would be in trouble most deep and would spend all my time wailing for paradise that has been lost. But praise be to God – I am a child of God by His work and His alone! I could go on and on about this work – what poetic majesty swells within me as I think of the person of Jesus Christ who lived and died and rose again – historical reality that makes the earth tremble in its wake. Jesus is my Savior who draws me to Himself when all else seems to dim and turn to dross. I need not fear for what’s been lost in this world for all I can say is that I have been found. A sheep I am that’s carried home. A coin I am that’s held aloft in joy. A son I am that’s been offered a place at the table once again. Oh one day how I long to break bread and wine with my Savior Lord. And at this table as I look at my fellow brothers and sisters and commiserate of our common failures (Adam, David, Peter – we have things to discuss) but better yet speak with delight of our common salvation, I can only hold back a sob as I consider the fact that this someday moment is not so far as it might be thought. Soon sometimes seems so far removed from this present me. Yet the day when all shall be changed and I shall be changed and I shall gaze upon my Lord’s face in bliss and joy? This day is drawing nearer. How precious it is to meditate on Jesus.
Light and Life
I have many thoughts swirling around my mind. Whether they are particularly good or inspired ones is a question for another day. But for the now, I’m grateful for a cosy home and a warm hoodie and a couch that is far more comfortable than it has any right to be. Many other things I can name in this space that deserve the praise, but shall I clutter this place with words too feeble to do justice? I feel now is not the time.
I will say how thankful I am for quiet 6am moments where the house is still and quiet and my mind waking up slowly yet unfilled by a day’s worth of worries thrills to the idea of reading a few pages in the word of God and delighting in truths that have been passed on to us for millennia and in caretaking of these truths I partake in worship as I ponder the wonders of the Holy God who has called me and calls me into closer communion with Himself day by day. And while at times it is tempting to spend time reminiscing and chronicling the past, my best thoughts in this morning hour are ones that look towards heaven. The past is blessed by God and wondrous enough. But what does future bring? Whispers of eternity fill my dreams and I tremble. Does your heart ache to know the joy that comes with seeing our God face to face? Mine does. I dwell on the promises of God and the peace that fills my heart through salvation that been granted me through the dazzling word and work of Jesus Christ my Lord. My eyes lift to heaven and my mind thinks of the eternal future that even now stretches before my slow and feeble feet. My flesh and my heart do fail. How good it is to be near God.
Starlight
This morning the dark lingers. The depth of winter grasps onto the light and keeps it away and while I would appreciate the first rays of sunlight to creep over the horizon, I know I must wait a few more minutes yet. Even so, I now appreciate the fact that I am beginning this week as the year winds to an end and I reflect over all that has been and muse over that which is and shall be. I wish to meditate upon truth in the lamplight that now spills over my shoulder. I have a book upon my lap which contains more of reality than my mind can ever grasp and I gasp to consider that the stars that blaze out overhead cannot outshine the enormity of the pillars of creation that have given me such a sure and steady confidence in the very God who holds my hand. Oh yes I am quite guilty of mixing a few metaphors as I attempt to muster my thoughts – consider that a testimony to the awe that fills my soul as I drink deep the love of God who fills all my dry and dusty places. For yes, this book that I mentioned earlier is the very Word of God – crafted by his hand and set afore us in the wisdom that is beyond our ken. But we may ask – is not this book merely written by common men? This is when our intellectual yearnings take over and we burn to find out more. I would wager – as indeed I have – that this book can hold up to any questions we can throw against it. Just taste and see. There is a divine reason that this book has held up throughout these many years and has placed such a burning in the hearts of those touched by the very Spirit of God. My heart longs for beauty. But beauty unmoored from reality is really no beauty at all, wouldn’t you say? And realizing that, I look up to the stars that sing the songs of heaven and I consider the truths that have enlivened my very soul. From where does my soul come? Or rather – from whom? Why do I long for that which my eyes cannot yet see? I yearn to meet the God greater than that which can be imagined by my little mind. But I do know him as he has for eternity known that he would be with me. What wonders, wonders fill my mind! See the light step over the horizon. I sip my mug of coffee and feel the pleasure that comes with that perfect first cup. Someday a more perfect pleasure will blaze in my soul as I sit at the feet of Jesus Christ and hear his words to me. For now though – I will echo the call of eternity for it does ring in even these everyday mundane realities. There is a song of joy that I would join and so I must away!
Something Weird 