LOVE

James HoganLeave a comment

Well, I almost got stuck reading all my old entries here, but then I remembered I did actually want to write something here! And maybe I won’t actually post this, so I could just write nonsense and delete it and no one would know how crazy I am. Um…wait, everyone already knows.

ANYWAY, I’ve been thinking lately(yes, it’s not as much a rarity as some of you may think) about lots of things and you’re all waiting to hear WHY in particular I wanted to talk about love. Ok, maybe you’re not all wondering that, but if you read my last entry(posted mere minutes ago!), you’ll know that I promised to talk about love sometime in the near future. Hmm, what could James possibly say about love? Well, it’s not as scandalous as you may think. And for some reason, I’m feeling really awake right now, so I may actually get through this after all! And I’m just typing my thoughts here, direct from the brain to the keyboard, so pardon any weirdness.

But yeah, love. What do I mean by this? And why again do I want to talk about it? Well, I think it’s partly due to my attending RUF a few times this semester and hearing some of the messages there(the series was entitled “Sex, Dating, and the Bible”). Anyway, got me thinking about marriage and what that crazy business entails. And no, I’m not thinking about marrying anyone anytime soon, no worries! But love in marriage is something really interesting, mostly because it’s so different from what most people in the world think it is. Most people hear the world “love” and think about that magic moment, that spark between two people, those special times alone, that feeling that will last forever because “we’re meant for each other”. And quite honestly, I do not like hearing any of that. I do think that there’s going to be one person I’m going to marry and that we will have just what God intended for us and that it’s going to be awesome. But I also know that neither of us are perfect. We’ll both be flawed human beings living solely by the grace of God. And that’s just fine.

Where we go wrong is when we expect marriage to be some magical institution that will make our lives so much better and that will fill a hole in our hearts. You know what, there’s Someone that can fill that hole so much better than anyone else…and that’s Jesus Christ. I don’t want to say marriage is bad, because obviously, I want to get married someday and it’s going to be sweeet. But it’s also going to be difficult. We’re going to have times where we don’t like each other and times when we really don’t want to be with that other person. And you know those feelings and butterflies you get when you see your special someone? Well, those won’t last forever. But by God’s grace, those two people will persevere in their covenant before God. And that’s what is so awesome about marriage – two people committing to live their lives as one, joining their disparate lives by a promise to love each other forever, by the grace of God.

So what is love? Well I think I’ve basically answered that question, but love isn’t some feeling or emotion…it’s ACTION. Love is how you treat your husband or wife when you’re tired and don’t want to talk with them or don’t want to hear about their problem…yet you do. Love is when you two are arguing and are so mad at each other…yet pray before God for grace to work out the problem and put aside your selfish pride and desires. Love is when you just KNOW(because you’re obviously always right) your way is the right way, yet humbly put her before yourself because the issue really isn’t that important.

Love is not some emotional outpouring of affirmation for the other, but showing her your commitment to serving God by putting her before yourself. Love is wanting to live your lives together for God, no matter what the price. Love is knowing that you in yourself have no power and humbling yourself before God to ask for his grace and power to love your husband or wife. This is what love is.

It felt good to share all that…I’d appreciate any comments and now I think I shall get some sleep…I am feeling rather tired now!

James HoganLeave a comment

Well, these last few days have just been utterly awesome. What can I say? I’m just blessed…

Ok, I guess I’ll start by just talking about today and then going backwards. Actually I was pretty exhausted this morning because I only got about four/five hours of sleep last night(finishing up my facilities report – LAST school thing this semester!!). So we went to church and I had a little trouble staying fully alert all the time, but it was a great service. We got to sing some sweet Christmas songs and hear a little more Genesis(chapter 47 – almost done!) Afterwards, talked for a while to various people…I have to say, I stay so much later at church now than I used to, it’s just ridiculous. Today it was partly because it was my last time at Creekside for the year! So I won’t see most of these people until next semester…so many goodbyes were said. We planned to go out to lunch at a Chinese buffet, but me and Rob sort of didn’t leave right away and were outside in the parking lot talking to Deanna, Shari, Amy, Jessica, etc…so yeah, we got held up. Eventually we made it over the restaurant and had fun times there with people…and afterwards me and Rob had some quality parking lot time AGAIN talking with Mary and Rebekah for quite a while…good times, good times.

So finally me and Rob came back to our place where I called my house and talked to the fam for a while…and then I was so tired I fell asleep for about a half hour. Then me and Rob went out on Flavet for some sweet football with Chris, Javier, etc(tackle again, so I’m sore again…my knee’s quite out-of-whack right now). That was awesome, just because football is always awesome. Me and Rob made a pizza when we got back and just chilled talking for a few hours…I gotta say, it’s great having a friend like him. We’re trying to decide where we want to live next year…we sort of want to move off campus, but we also really like the convenience of being on campus…we’re definitely undecided as of yet. We were also talking about our pasts and just what we’ve been going through these past few years…made me really nostalgic(and want to write/read in this!) One quote I shall share from him(and the context will not be provided!)…”We said this semester we’re going down…next semester, we’re REALLY going down!” We shall see..

Wow, and if I wrote that much just for today…this entry may prove to be rather long.

Ok, now for yesterday…you may think that on a Saturday(with no exams in front of me) I’d sleep in. That’d be natural and normal, right? Well of course, that’s not what I did. Cindy was in a Brain Bowl competition here at the Union, so me and Rob got up around 8 to watch her and her team compete. That was pretty fun and I got to feel sort of smart occasionally when I knew an answer. Me and Rob decided we were going to make up a school and enter the next competition and dominate on those high-schoolers… Feel free to apply within to be on th dream team of Jackson County Prep.

After we left that and went to the store, me and Rob went over to Deanna, Amy and Shari’s for an awesome movie afternoon watching – what better – Braveheart. Most of the girls there hadn’t seen it, so we had fun introducing them to brutal medieval violence. I always forget how bad it is until I see it again! Still, never bad watching people’s faces smashed in or seeing beast Scots decapitate the English. “…playing outlawed tunes on outlawed pipes…” It was just an awesome time hanging out with fun people…wish I could do things like that all the time.

After that epic adventure, me and Rob had to scoot on over to Dream and Laura’s party(which we were late to, oops..). I brought my expertly crafted salad(which seemed to be received pretty well!) and we got to enjoy all the other awesome food there. But the food was the least of it…we got to hang with other awesome people! I say, I have too many good friends. We watched the Heismann Trophy presentation, which, of course, Timmy Tebow won. It was so great to see that, because he deserved it so much more than any of the other finalists. It was funny though…he was so nervous, he talked super-fast in his speech. But he gave glory to God first and foremost, and that was good to hear. After that, we all had fun singing and dancing…probably everyone outside the apartment thought we were drunk. Hey, we were drunk on life! My favorite part was when we sang Christmas carols together though…so amazing singing praise to God with friends. Me and Rob finally had to leave that to try to get sleep(which unfortunately I didn’t because I had that facilities report).

Now we move to Friday…hmm, maybe I’ll eventually finish this entry! I finally got to sleep in a little bit(well, maybe a lot – 11am!) after all my exams/presentations. After that, I hung out with Dream and Laura for a while, walking with them on their errands around campus, then relaxing at the pond behind the Union and taking crazy pictures. Eventually, I made it back to Keys and got ready for the first event of the night, Deanna and Jessica’s grad party! They’re graduating this next Saturday(craziness! I can’t believe some of my friends are already graduating…at least Deanna will stay at UF for another year for grad work). It was a sweet time at the party there, again seeing multitudes of friends and just enjoying being with people and having good fellowship. Rob and I had to leave that eventually to hit our next party of the night, Katie and Lindsey’s party! Great times playing the Wii(which I’m terrible at! Except Wii baseball – which I got a home run…amazing!), Apples to Apples, eating so much sugar and again, just enjoying being around friends. We stayed there until about two or three o’clock, at which time we decided we should probably leave. Yes we were the last ones to leave…

Ok, so I don’t make this an entry TOO epic, I’ll try to speed through the next few days…Thursday I worked all morning for the IPPD presentations at the Union and that night me and Rob and Galan got to hang out with the Lebos! Great time seeing them, since I feel we haven’t been able to be with them as much this semester…so sad! Wednesday night was the last Creekside study and was totally awesome, and Tuesday night was RUF worship night and my first ever time playing ultimate frisbee! It’s pretty sweet, I must admit. It was freezing cold and since I’m out of shape, I was tired after 30 minutes, but I enjoyed it so much…running all over the field, trying to make a play…great game.

Ok, I’ve gone through all the past five days or so…I should probably stop now. But if you’ve actually read all that, you’re either 1)crazy, 2)bored, or 3)way too interested in my life. I just had to write down all the awesome times I’ve had…parties with friends, dinners with friends, talks with friends…can’t go wrong. Side-note, I saw the RUF ladies(Deanna, Shari, Amy, Jessica) five out of the past six days(only missed Thursday)…I just thought that was random and awesome.

And now I really will end this…I want to write some of my recent thoughts on love in another entry…but I may fall asleep before that. So sorry if this ends being an empty promise!

I’ll be in Tampa by Thursday…happy…and sad at the same time! Can’t wait, yet will miss so many people here.

For real, farewell. If you read all this, you must comment so I can give you a cookie for being a masochist…goodnight!

James HoganLeave a comment

EXAMS ARE DONE!!!

Ok, I know probably everyone hates me now, since I’m done so early this semester. But I just had to say it!! I’ve been wanting to write in here lately, but just never got around to it since I had so much work to do…but finally, I’m almost done with this semester! All I have left is two project reports to finish writing up and one project presentation on Wednesday. So yes, I’m sitting pretty right now! I have NO IDEA how my grades are going to pan out right now, but I honestly don’t want to think about that right now. It’s just a great feeling not to have to stress over exams anymore! Thank you, Lord, that I’ve survived.

In other news…hmm, well most of my recent days have been spent studying(I missed the Creekside Christmas party yesterday to study for my two exams today). Today I had my OR2 final and then just now my Marketing final. I think I dominated the marketing exam. OR2…who knows?

Ok, no more exam talk, I promise! Switching subjects…the Gators are going to the Capitol One Bowl! Not quite the title game, but it’ll suffice. We’re playing Michigan, so that will be a pretty fun game(and yes, they’re going dowwwwwn!) Last week was the FSU game – so much fun! We were 7 rows from the field, which was pretty awesome(except when the teams were at the other end of the field). After we pounded them 45-12, we went down and high-fived the players, including Tebow(who Dream got a great picture of).

That night, instead of staying in Gainesville like most people, I went back to Tampa with Chris’ parents…because the next day, I was going to the Bucs/Redskins game!!!! Man, I was so excited to find that out. And now I remember I already wrote about this, but anyway, it was a great game, finally being able to watch my Redskins in person!! It was fun wearing my Darrell Green jersey and talking with the other Skins fans. Sadly, we lost, but I’ll always remember my first Redskins game! In other Redskins news, Sean Taylor was shot and killed on Sunday night. Sometimes you hear about players dying, but it hits you a lot more when it’s your own team. It’s weird thinking about it, knowing that Taylor was one of the best players in the NFL, one of the best athletes in America…and someone could come into his bedroom and shoot him. Really reminds you of the brevity of life…

Ok, getting off that sad topic, it’s now Christmas season!! It’s so hard to enjoy the holiday season until I’m done with school, but since I practically am done now, I can enjoy looking forward to Christmas and all the parties that come along with that… Speaking of Christmas, I really need to start my Christmas shopping…

And now, I’m going to go hunt for something to eat, since all I had to eat for dinner earlier was a salad. Not bad, but not a full meal by any means…

Before I sign off, one more thing I wanted to mention – I became a member at Creekside yesterday! It’s been a good three years going there and I wanted to show my commitment to the church…so great being up at the front of the church with the other new members, being affirmed by the congregation and the elders…I really do love that church. Thanks be to God who enabled me to find it!

And now I really am off. Farewell all!

James HoganLeave a comment

Thanksgiving…what a wonderful day!

It’s getting late now, so I don’t have time for a long entry. And I should probably clarify that by saying it’s late for my house(definitely not late by college standards!) Anyway, I’ve had a long, relaxing, fun filled day…

And I realized I haven’t posted in here in so long – I have been rather busy lately with exams, homework, projects and all, so pardon the lack of updates. I do have some stuff I wish I could write more about, but alas, it’s not to be. One of the more fun weekends lately I went up to South Carolina with Rob, Ryan, Brandon and Stephanie for the Gators game(my first away game I’ve been to!) and to visit James Walden and his family…such a great weekend! And we dominated, which made it even better. Speaking of great games, after the Gators/Noles game on Saturday, I’m going to come back to Tampa on Saturday night because on Sunday I’m going to the Redskins/Bucs game!!! I am SO excited!!! It’s going to be my first ever pro game, and thus my first ever Redskins game! It’s going to be a blast, even if it’s not as exciting as college games…

Anyways, I’ve been pretty stressed lately with all my classes…this semester I’ve had a pretty big workload. Hopefully I’ll get some A’s, but this is my first semester that I don’t have any “sure A’s” at this point in the semester. I had a rough four-hour programming exam Monday night(my computer died in the middle of it! I need to either get it fixed or get a new computer…can’t have it affecting my grade like that) and then a 2 hour Microprocessor lab exam the next morning at 7:30. And that’s just some of it. It’s just good to see the light at the end of the tunnel…and God is keeping me strong through it all.

And this has now become less of a Thanksgiving entry and more of an update entry! Which I guess isn’t a bad thing, but this entry was SUPPOSED to be about Thanksgiving! So basically today, I watched a few marketing lectures in the morning(yeah, it had to be done…) and then we all went over to the Phelps for Thanksgiving dinner! Steve’s parents were there, but Katharyn was missing, so that was sad. But she’ll be back for Christmas! Anyway, I had a great time relaxing, talking to the Phelps, watching some football(with Miracle of 34th Street thrown in during commercials) and of course…eating. I think I actually didn’t eat as much as during Thanksgivings past, but it was a marvelous feast! Turkey, potatoes, dressing, asparagus, and PIES. Lots and lots of pies. I had a piece of cherry pie, a piece of apple pie, a piece of pumpkin pie and a small piece of pecan pie…yes, it was amazing. But the best part of the day was just being with people I love and knowing we are all thankful for each other and God’s love and what He has done for us. What a wonderful treasure that is!!

I really should end this entry soon, or I may have to put it under a cut…nah. I’ve just been super-thankful lately, despite some trials I’ve gone through lately, God has uplifted me when I’ve been down and reminded me of His graces when I’ve been cheerful. While I still wonder about the future and what God has for me, He’s given me more of a peace and I am truly grateful for that. And since I do want to end this soon, I’ll say one more thing and just say that to all my friends that are reading this, I’m also so thankful to all of you that love me despite all my shortcomings…friends are a wonderful thing. Hope you all have had a wonderful Thanksgiving – God bless you all!!

James HoganLeave a comment

This weekend has been pretty awesome…I gotta say. I thought going in, I would have a ton of homework and that I would have no time for fun at all. But the Lord was good and I got all my major homework done early, so I had time to chill. The three-day weekend really helped me catch up on sleep, and I’ve been going to bed around 12 or so for the past few nights. So I feel rested and relaxed right now, after being at the awesome Creekside fall picnic. So much fun just being around friends!! This whole weekend has been great like that…I love my friends! And the weather has FINALLY been fall-like(which resulted in a sweet game of tackle football on Friday) which always puts me in a good mood. What a great weekend the Lord has made!

Sing Alleluia to our God!

James HoganLeave a comment

Been having a sweet weekend so far…even though it’s about to get ugly as I start doing some massive studying for my two exams this week. Oh well. Friday, Rob, Laura, Galan, and I hung out, since Laura tore her ACL and couldn’t go swing dancing with Dream- she’s going to have surgery soon, which hopefully will help her get back to running soon. Anyways, Friday night was awesome – we went and saw Harry Potter 5 at the Reitz…great movie. Very fast-paced and crazy, but I enjoyed it, despite the moody Harry parts. After that, we came back to our place and ate ice cream, made a pizza, and played some cards, after which I went to Galan’s place and played Halo 3 for hours(since his roommate was gone for the weekend). I eventually got some sleep(not saying what time!) and then woke up about 12 on Saturday…I needed to catch up on sleep! Courtney came in from Tally, and we all went to the Creekside college football party at the Fregly’s…great time! A lot of volleyball(and I mean A LOT!) was played by all…the game doesn’t warrant mentioning further though. Anyways, it was great being with everyone. After the game, we went to Southwest Rec and played beach volleyball for a while(Told ya we played a lot of volleyball!)

Anyway, thought I should start a new paragraph, since I’m not done yet…after those volleyball games, me, Rob, Galan, and Courtney went to Galan’s house and watched “The Prestige”, a really sweet movie(really messes with your mind). Today was equally awesome, with a good time at church, and then more hanging out with Galan and Courtney(even though we were all super-exhausted – hmm, I wonder why…)

Tonight was prayer and praise, which was super awesome…I so much enjoy the fellowship with everyone there…so grateful for all the friends God’s given me there…Dream, Rob, Galan, Mecca, David, etc, etc, I could go on and on! Indeed, God is good. And that is all. Wow, I’m feeling quite joyful now, despite knowing I’ll probably be studying all night. Farewell, all!

James HoganLeave a comment

You may ask while I’m still up…well, there’s an easy answer to that: Web DSS homework. It’s some of the most ridiculous homework ever; we’re going through the material so fast that I’m not fully understanding what we’re doing. So with this homework, I just have to try to figure it out by trial-and-error, which is no fun, let me tell you that. Anyway, I just took a shower and am taking a short break before going back to work.

I can’t wait for this weekend, I can tell you that – this week has been so crazy with homework and project work and lab work…I’ve gotten little sleep, yet I’m still going. This weekend will be just as busy with studying(for two exams next week) and homework…but just to have one Friday night to relax will be most beneficial to my health.

Before I go off and do(i.e. attempt) more homework, I have to talk a little about our football game tonight…tonight was our flag football intramural playoff game! This has been a really weird season, because we were supposed to have four games, yet 3 of them were canceled due to rain, so we only got to play one other game, sadly. And strangely enough, our playoff game tonight was against the one other team we played(who beat us 10-9 in a hard-fought game). Anyway, this morning dawned bright and clear, around sixty degrees..perfect football weather!! After a lot of classes and project work(and a sweet lunch with Ryan), we finally started our football game at 7pm.

Anyway, it was such a defensive struggle…Neither of us could really move the ball the whole game. I made a few awesome plays, though. Near the end of the game, the other team threw it deep and their receiver caught it, running for the end zone with no one to stop him…I came across the field and dived, grabbing his flag about ten yards short of the endzone(very surprising to me, since I’m not that fast!) And on that same drive(I think 2nd down), they threw the ball, one of my teammates tipped it, and I dived for it, grabbing it with outstretched arms before falling to the ground. Such an awesome interception!! And now you’re probably thinking, “Wow, James is really bragging it up…what a arrogant guy…” Don’t worry, my ego will be brought low in a few minutes…after that interception, the game ended with the score 0-0(crazy!) Overtime started and they got the ball on our 10 and scored on 4th down. Oh well. We went in on offense, and on 2nd or 3rd down, after snapping the ball I rolled out to the right, WIDE OPEN. Lauren(our QB) threw the ball up to me…the ball was in the air for so long, that I had time to think, “Wow, this is the game-winning touchdown right here…” Yep, I let me mind wander(the ball was hanging in the air for at least 5 seconds!) and I lost the ball in the field lights….and it missed my hands, hitting my chest! So, yes, I dropped the game-winning touchdown. Happy now? We almost scored after that, but Lauren was a yard short of the endzone. So we lost. But what a game!

Ok, I bet a lot of you didn’t really care to read about all that football, but I wanted to write it. And it was a good break from DSS homework. Good night all(hope the rest of you are in bed, where I wish I could be!)

James HoganLeave a comment

Good times in college…finally played Halo 3 yesterday at Galan’s place – sweet game, so much better than Halo 2…I remember when I first played the original Halo and how bad I was at it, but how much I had fun with it. So many years ago! Anyway, this was a sweet weekend(involving me eating pizza about 5 times during the course of it!) but now I’m dreading this week with some crazy homework I didn’t know about until earlier this evening.

And besides all the fun things that have been going on, I’ve been having my own mental battles…I’m not crazy enough to go into all of it here…anyway, I just thank God that He is God and that He is. Without that, how lost would I be…


Sighing, I weep and weeping, I write, what is the
meaning, the meaning of life. What does this
blood mean? What does it do? I feel stabbed
by your apathy, wounded by you. Give me your
heart drops, give me your tears.
God knows I’ve given you mine.

James HoganLeave a comment

God is so good. Good times talking with good friends…indeed, we are blessed! After being so busy for the past few weeks, God reminds me how He is always watching over me…and today was just a great day. Creekside was great as usual and lunch with people afterwards(Hot Wok!) was ever so fun…and I actually got some homework done this afternoon! Homework that isn’t due until Friday! Am I mad? Well, I guess that question is still up for debate, but the homework got partly done, and that’s just awesome. And later this evening, we had prayer and praise at the church…such a great time singing outside and then discussing our thoughts inside. I feel so blessed to have such great friends and fellowship. And after the time, me, Rob, Dream, Mecca, and Galan talked and talked out in the parking lot about our lives…what’s happening now in them, what we want them to be, what we’re wishing for at this stage in our lives…truly, great conversations. Such a great bond of fellowship. Afterwards, went to Publix and got my soda for the next few weeks, YES. After that, went back and talked to Dream for a while…reminded how great it is having her as a friend(don’t get a big head, Dream!). And now, I am content to do some more homework and go to sleep…what a great day the Lord has made.