sometimes i wish i had another calling

far too often these days of late as the sun slides closer to horizon’s embrace
my heart has sprung up with a yearning my mind does not know how to answer
do you hear the music too?
or is it all just in my head
keeping time with the footsteps that continually sound from above
i see you sighing and in a moment perhaps i’ll slide down to your end of the couch
for now i let my fingers wrap around this mug and i breathe deep and wonder
for the thousandth time why me
this prisoner exchange that i ponder, that he might die so that i might go free
it’s too much really for such a poor one as i
and as i tilt my head and think on it i can’t help but begin to cry
you notice but pretend not to politely or so it seems to me
your head burrowed a little deeper into your kindle
my head bowed over this cup of strong black tea